Games

The girls are adjusting nicely to having a little #3 around the house. The two-on-two parenting that has governed our way of life for the last 4 years has suffered only slight disruption and the girls are handling it well, even Mae.

I'm sure this happens a lot within families with two active parents and two children: the kids tend to pick a parent and stick with them. Bela gravitates toward Chris, Mae toward me. The fact that we have had our hands full lately seems to be understood and forgiven, but it has also inspired some new "games" to pass the time.

Both girls stayed home from school last Thursday because they were up all night puking all over everything in sight (story later).  I laid in bed with Gil until almost 11am, groggy, recovering from the night's puke-a-thon, but I could hear the girls completely involved in some role-playing game where Bela was taking care of Mae. When I dragged my pathetic self out of bed she announced what they were doing and proudly stated that she had done a good job taking care of her little sister.

I later discovered that not only did Bela get Mae bathed, dressed, and ready for the day, but she also fed her an early lunch: crackers, jello, juice, and "bug drink" (kefir). When asked if she was pretending to be Mae's mommy, Bela responded that she was still just her big sister.

"Where's your mommy?" I asked.

"Mommy's dead."

And that's game #1.


Game number 2 also seems to have been developed by Bela in an attempt to help Mae transition to a life without Mommy.  She has devised a point-system and has carefully written it out on a piece of paper the girls keep on a table near their beds. Each time Mae shows a preference for me and refuses to let her daddy help her in one way or another, she gets an X on a number. However, if she allows Chris to do her some small deed, or takes his hand instead of mine, she gets a circle. I suppose the goal is to get as many circles as possible.

Today, we took the girls to the Chriskindl market in Daley Plaza, and Mae insisted on holding my hand all afternoon. X. But this evening, she gave Chris an unsolicited hug. Circle.

I'm grateful for their creativity and their independence and for these precious moments they allow me with their newest sister, but I can't help but feel a wee bit sad. Bela insists that she is trying to make Chris feel better by convincing Mae to be nicer to him, but it feels like Bela is preparing Mae for the inevitable: losing Mommy to a little sister.

Gil's "high-heeled" socks